BelovedMania

bad luck

2008-05-15T19:39:15Z

Yes, bad luck strikes again as it seems to quite often in the Landis family.
Well, ever since Paul and I moved in I'd say my bad luck has been rubbing off on him...and I've probably passed the curse down to Michael as well.
Last night Paul hit a damn deer on the way home from work like a mile or two away from our apartment...on a road under construction. Lovely. So, unless we can find someone who'll either fix it for cheap or we find out that the BASIC things that need to be fixed won't be too expensive....or unless we can ghetto-rig the bumper up and replace the headlight on the driver's side...we're basically without a car. That feels crappy because the very thought of it makes me feel like a prisoner in my own home. We could get rides to and from work/school and that'd be about it. We can't afford to get a different car...even a used one. And thankfully there's nothing SERIOUSLY wrong with the vehicle (it's all "cosmetic.") Then again, you can get a ticket for not having a headlight and a lot of it isn't safe. The hood is bent upward a little, too...but the latches still work, so maybe we can pound it out? I don't know. I just know that one of the headlights is completely fucked (think if someone gouged it out like an eyeball,) the other headlight keeps popping out (residual damage,) the bumper is just completely...well...fucked, and the hood is bent upward. Oh, not to mention all the fur and blood that's scattered all over the front end of the van.

And I know it sounds like I'm complaining about how bad my life sucks, even though I'm not trying to make it sound that way. Crap, I'm thankful for what I do have. I may not have a TON, but I know I have a lot more than some people do and we're able to make do with what we have. In a few years when we're done with school and we're set in our careers...things will be better. It's just a matter of biting the bullet for the time being.

HAHA, and get this....the people below us are total assholes. They constantly scream at their kid, cussing him out and hitting him so hard that you can hear the smacks through their door downstairs if you're walking down the steps. I can hear their phone through our floor and we're above them. A lot of crap goes down in this building involving cops, drugs, obnoxious kids, and many other annoying events. One day Paul got home from work around 7:30 pm and the guy below us caught him just as he was walking into the building. He told him there was a lot of banging going on coming from out apartment and got all pissy about it. Paul came up to check it out....it was simply our 8-month-old kicking his feet and legs around while playing on the floor. This is....
A) How they learn to crawl and...
B) How they strengthen their legs

many doctors, nurses, and other people I know/have met in the medical field have told me that babies need plenty of tummy time/floor time for developmental reasons. So, we tried putting pillows under him so his kicks wouldn't annoy them so much, but he's 8 months old...so he rolls right off the pillows. I can't chase him around w/ pillows all day long.

This leads me into TODAY....the girl who lives w/ the asshole downstairs knocked on my door. I didn't come to the door the first time because this building is full of crazies and i wasn't expecting anyone. Honestly, I was scared. I finally hung up the phone and answered after the second knock. She was telling me about how they could hear whatever noise it was coming from our apartment "ALL THE TIME." So, I opened the door up for her so she could look in, I pointed to my son and said, "Well, I don't know what you want me to do. That's my 8-month-old in his SAUCER and there's really nothing I can do about it." She looked at me and said, "ok, i just wanted you to know that we can hear it." I was totally livid, called the landlord and told him, "I don't know what the hell is wrong w/ the people below us, but they complain every time I put my EIGHT MONTH OLD on the floor to play or in his saucer. I don't know what they want me to do....PUT HIM IN HIS FREAKIN' CRIB ALL DAY LONG??" I guess he is going to talk to them or something. And for those of you who don't know what a saucer is...think of a walker for babies, only it has a big piece of plastic on the bottom so they can't actually walk it all over the house. It's basically for them to jump in. And dude, what do they expect living in an apartment??? And what's this "ALL THE TIME" bullshit? She came up to complain at 12:30 PM...around LUNCH. Michael doesn't get up til between 8 and 10 am, and he isn't making any of that noise after 7 or 8 pm. Technically, they can't do crap as far as a noise complaint goes because he isn't doing it after 11 pm. It isn't anything we're doing intentionally and I'm sorry, but my son doesn't understand what "no" means. I can't tell him to quit moving and not to make a sound...but oh yeah, any time their child even tries to talk they tell him to shut the hell up. This is ridiculous. Why don't they complain about something a little more relevant? Like the people smoking dope who the cops are always here for??? One of em' lives right across from them. I never complain about them yelling and smacking their kids around. Plus, they live BELOW an apartment, so what can they expect?? There is going to be some degree of noise especially because our floor is their ceiling.

i hope they choke. I feel horrible for their kid. I ought to call social services on them one day. You wanna start a war? You begin it, bitch...I'll end it.

Wedding bells

2008-05-06T12:38:33Z

So, Paul and I went to his mother's wedding on Saturday (5/3/08.) It was small and beautiful in a wonderful boathouse in Milwaukee...somewhere off of Green Bay Rd. I felt special because we got reserved front row seats :) Hey, I AM the mother of her grandchild, right? ;) haha
Anyway, I uploaded the pictures from the wedding, but they are on MySpace. So, if anyone is interested...go there. Her dress was stunning! And shit, for being 50-ish...her body is SLAMMIN! She goes to the gym every day, which is something I ought to do. Her shoes, hair, make-up, nails, dress...everything was perfect. Michael did a really good job during the ceremony, too. Didn't start talking or screaming...nothing. He was an angel.
Of course, later on when I fed him green beans he thought it'd be funny to blow out really hard onto a full spoon of the stuff and spray it all over his face. I have a picture of that on MySpace, too. It's great. You gotta check em out! :)
Oh yeah, and Saz's did the catering...amazing catering. I am just taking this all in and getting ideas for my own wedding. Ugh, and that cake....both gorgeous and scrumptious! I don't think I've ever had a cake that was so yummy. It had the creamiest frosting and the cake itself had raspberries in it. I am telling you...PERFECTION!!! I think I'm going to get my cake at the same place. Mmm...

<3

belovedmania @ 2008-04-26T22:17:00

2008-04-27T03:24:28Z

You learn who your real friends are when you have a kid. Seriously. And let me tell you what...I don't have many.
I have one friend..someone I just met at Rosati's when she started in april of '07...but we probably didn't start talking til summer-ish. She's pretty much my only friend or only friend who I see right now.
I guess it's cool cuz we both have kids. Her son is about a year older than Michael..and we think a lot alike and feel the same way about lots of things. So, our idea of a good time is sitting around with our kids, talking, playing with them, and watching movies.
My life has become pretty boring, hey??

Two years ago I said to myself, "Damn, if my life were a movie...it'd be a hit...a box office HIT! A real money maker."
Mmm...these days....people would fall asleep during the movie of my life, I'm sure. I miss some stuff and people from years ago and would sometimes like to relive it, but I guess you could say i've started a new chapter in my life. It's not the same by any means, but it's really good. I'm stable in basically every way but financially...but it's a work in progress. That's why I am in school. I love my finace and I love my son. My family is great and life isn't too shabby.

SOOOOOO HAPPY!

2008-04-13T02:43:40Z

My persuasive speech is done! I felt like being nice this time around and signing up to go third the first day of speeches. Last time I chose to not go until the second day, and since I don't have any sort of fear of public speaking...well, not much anyway...I should just go first to help out those who do have that fear. I know people usually hate being one of the first ones up, but I don't care. This speech has been ridiculous. Dude had one sheet of requirements...what our outline should include and stuff. Then he wanted us to also go by this stupid Motivated Sequence sheet, so it made it really really hard. Everyone was confused. I asked him the same question as some other kid did, and he gave us completely different answers. Then I pointed out a contradiction in this whole thing, and goes, "Oh yeah..nevermind. Don't worry about that."
The man who teaches this class is a super sweet man, but sometimes he seriously needs to get his stuff together, ya know what I mean? Like...pay attention to what kind of assignments you are putting together for people. We are in college, not high school or grade school. And I'll tell you what, I care about my grades...one could say i am overly anal. i see a lot of people not care...they only want to pass...but I really do. Back when I was having problems, I tried going to school and quit each time. One or two of those classes got marked down as an F because I dropped so late. So, my GPA looks like rat barf which means I really have to kick ass in every class I take to make up for it. The one over the summer ended with an A. So far I'm getting an A in both classes here. I am taking a math course this summer, and i am considering taking three rather than two courses in the fall (when I'll have an oh-so-needed student loan finally!) I'm sure a lot of people hate me or call me a spoiled brat for it, but my dad is awesome and is gonna pay for my summer class since I cannot get financial aid til fall. It's really cool that I have parents who'll go the extra mile for me. My mom will come over and help me with Michael almost at the drop of a hat if I need to get school stuff done...and she brings over lil surprises here and there. Not even kidding, she even does our dishes while I'm in class! Isn't that nuts? Good nuts, though. And you know what? I appreciate it. I tell my mother all the time that I hope she doesn't think I am asking her to do them or that she has to...or that I invite her over just to do stuff for me...I'm glad she doesn't think that. And Chris comes over quite a bit now, too. I go over there...so Michael knows his grandma landis and grandma chris pretty well and loves them to death...along with his silly uncles. He doesn't get to see Paul's side quite as often because they live like...40 or 45 minutes away and paul works a lot. But Michael loves his auntie beth, his cousins, his other grandma and grandpas (Craig, Barb, etc.) I wish I could get him down there to see them more because I'd really like for Michael to have a really good relationship with all of them...the kind that I do with my side of the family.
Ok, I babbled on. And it's getting late...i finished my speech...michael's waking up...I should probably let my mom get home here soon.
<3 you all!

....oh, and one more thing!!!!

Isn't he cuuuute?! You can see his lil teeth!! And he looks so OLD in this pic...like he is over a year old! He's getting so big so fast. Nooo :( Before you know it he'll be telling me he hates me, i'm ruining his life, and he's moving out. :( :( :(

If you never read anything else I post, at least read this!!!!

2008-04-09T19:26:42Z

So, I am sure many of you wish you had money to donate to charities or you are into doing charitable things when it is possible.

If you go to www.thehungersite.com, you can donate for FREE. For real. You can go there once every day, click on the thing it tells you to, and bam...you are done. You've donated 1.1 cups of food.
I'm thinking about making it my homepage so I remember each day. It's an awesome thing. :)

<3 my family

2008-04-03T21:08:26Z

awww, my family.

this was x-mas morning, holding up one of michael's presents from under the tree...holding it above him. of course, i'm in my pjs and this isn't a very becoming picture of me, but whatever,

Michael in his santa outfit with his dad on x-mas eve at my mom's house. Sometimes i swear he's such a daddy's boy... :)

by the way...

2008-03-27T21:17:18Z

we have roadrunner and a mac laptop. for some reason, this thing feels slower than hell. loading pictures on myspace...reminds me of dial-up. wtf?

wowie

2008-03-27T21:00:22Z

i think it said the last time i'd updated this was likel....39 weeks ago. well, we finally have the internet! woohoo!! so I can post a million pictures of michael everywhere, cuz that's what every mother does...duh.
i think that is about it? paul and i got engaged a little while ago. we're expecting to get married late spring/early summer '09.

and i have a quick question for anyone who is catholic. isn't a huge part of that religion the idea of forgiveness and family togetherness? So, if you do something when you are young, but get yourself back on track and do better than you ever have in your life...doesn't that mean your own FLESH AND BLOOD ought to forgive you and move on with it? so...at 40.;...50...60....70, that person will still be paying for it?
Doesn't seem right.

Hiiii!

2007-06-25T16:33:04Z

Hello to the public....since I rarely make public posts.
Yep, don't have a computer at home so I use the lab at school every once in a while. This isn't the best way to keep in touch with me...gotta call or write me.
Ladies, I am going to be figuring out some sort of baby shower soon...so, yeah...ya'll are invited. =)

That's really about it for now. I'm hungry and in need of getting a paper typed for my psych class. Mmmhmm.

hiii!

2007-03-09T15:53:02Z

Yes, I am alive! Let's see...haven't been living with the parents for a while.
Paul (my boyfriend) and I have been living together since December 4th-ish. We're expecting to have a baby at the end of September...as soon as we have enough money, there'll be a nice ring on my hand and a wedding planned.
That's the news...and I have a new cell number. It's the old one, only the last four digits are 4018.
Alright, that's all. I don't have a computer at my house, so give me a call or something sometime. I pretty much never go on AIM, livejournal, myspace, or check my email even when I am visiting my parents.
Hope everyone is doing well. =)

Wishing you a safe journey....

2006-07-13T04:53:33Z

....into the great beyond.

RIP EVAN

I regret not hanging out more and not writing up the idea to my movie with you...let there be life after death. <3
You are and will be missed dearly.

I don't know if anybody noticed, but there was a nice article about Evan in the newspaper...I cut it out & I'm gonna save it...in memory of Rock 'N Roll Evan.

I'm all alone & it's you that I want ;)

2006-07-13T02:42:11Z

hahaha, wow...I'm a nerd. I love this song. I don't know why...I guess it's just super catchy, and because Nelly Furtado sings it I always think of my big sis (Dee.)

Anyone else like this song?

belovedmania @ 2006-06-27T21:18:00

2006-06-28T02:20:29Z

Oh yeah, my black latex dress has a huge hole in it. I know there's a way to fix it, provided I purchase a lil square of latex or something...and heat it...melt it onto the dress, I believe.

Anyone know exactly what/how i'm supposed to go about doing this?
not that I actually wear that thing very often...in fact, I think I wore it last to an SMB show with Tim, but I don't like it when my stuff doesn't work right. :( Help.

Oh, and by the way...

2006-06-27T02:28:31Z

I'm probably going to have my cell phone number changed within the next few days. Leave a message if you want it...and if you don't have it when I change it, I either forgot (because I'll have so many people to hand it out to all over again,) or else you don't have it for a reason.

And yes, there is a reason as to why I'm changing it. Two reasons, actually...

belovedmania @ 2006-06-26T21:25:00

2006-06-27T02:26:28Z

Test coming up on Wednesday in class...I know I'm gonna kick its ass.
My job absolutely blows, so I really need to look for something better...better paying and a better environment, however...this will have to do for now.

I guess this post is just here to show everyone that hey, I'm still alive & kickin'. :)

I really am the best.

2006-06-11T22:39:39Z

I'm still obsessed with that MasterCook Delux software I own. It was super cheap and more than worth the like....$19.99 I paid for it. Well, I used a gift card so i supposed i didn't really pay for it.

Anyway, I'm making Lemon Swirl Rolls tonight. It's really cool because it also includes the nutritional analysis based on a 2,000 calorie-per-day diet. Here's the recipe in case any of you are interested...

TOPPING AND FILLING
1/2 cup butter or margarine, melted
1 1/4 cups packed light brown sugar
3/4 cup chopped walnuts
2 tablespoons grated lemon peel

DOUGH
3 cups all-purpose flour
1/4 cup sugar
1 package Fleischmann's Rapid Rise Yeast
1 teaspoon salt
1/4 cup butter or margarine, cut up
1 egg
1/2 cup warm milk (105º to 115ºF)
1/4 cup warm water (105º to 115ºF)

And I'm off to make this! =)

Oh, and I have an interview at 4 pm on Tuesday for a job. I'm pretty sure they're gonna hire me because the manager chased me down in the parking lot after I turned in my application and was leaving...pretty funny!

belovedmania @ 2006-06-09T14:02:00

2006-06-09T19:07:13Z

I'm going to sit down now and watch this loverrrly Dresden Dolls dvd I bought MONTHS ago with a Best Buy gift card.
And Tim, if you want to borrow it just let me know. Otherwise, the three of us can watch it the next time we all hang out. Does Suzi enjoy them as well?

I have applications I need to drop off today, too. I picked up another one earlier and filled it out while I was still there...gave it back to the lady before I left. She was horribly rude to everybody, though. I dislike people like that...they don't know what "customer service" means. I mean, I could understand if someone was giving you a really hard time and just being a pain in the ass, but to just be rude to everyone walking through that door...ridiculous. Why? Because without them there'd be no business, no business means that person wouldn't have a job there, no job there means they wouldn't be getting paid. It's really quite astonishing how much we all take for granted. And hell, I'm more guilty of it than anyone! I admit to it, though.
Oh, I had court this morning, too. Anyone can call me if he/she is interested in the outcome. Obviously nothing too horrible happened because I'm at home, right? ;)

Okay, time for some Dresden Dolls and perhaps a nap with my puppy.

belovedmania @ 2006-06-06T23:12:00

2006-06-07T04:16:30Z

I've been sooo very girly lately...and soooo very full of awesome stories. I've had more interesting stuff happen to me within the last 24 hours than most people have happen to them in like...6 months. No kidding. Well, my appointment at 9:30 am tomorrow ought to be interesting enough. Heh, wish me luck.

I suppose I should get crackin' away at my Abnormal Psych book. I am supposed to have chapter one read by tomorrow night's class and a subject picked out for a project we're doing. Y'know, I have to admit that I'm pretty excited about this class. It already has my full attention, so I anticipate doing well in this class.

Goodnight everyone!

belovedmania @ 2006-06-04T12:57:00

2006-06-04T17:58:41Z

Hmm...I don't come on here much anymore. I had some really weird dreams last night that had/has me really worrying about somebody. I guess if anyone wants to know what's been going on the last few months...just call me. Too lazy to type.

belovedmania @ 2006-05-22T19:10:00

2006-05-23T00:11:16Z

Come on, tell me it isn't obvious that I'm talking ABOUT you TO you.
Don't act as though you're completely oblivious to the facts.
And even though you'll never see this...your advice is so vague. I can't tell if you know or not. And if you do...I wish you'd just say something so I don't have to waste forever wondering. Yeah, you tell me I worry too much...too much that you don't know or if you did...you wouldn't care.
Suckage.
</emo>

Where'd you go?
I miss you so,
Seems like it's been forever,
That you've been gone.

She said "Some days I feel like shit,
Some days I wanna quit, and just be normal for a bit,"
I don't understand why you have to always be gone,
I get along but the trips always feel so long,
And, I find myself tryna stay by the phone,
'Cause your voice always helps me when I feel so alone,
But I feel like an idiot, workin' my day around the call,
But when I pick up I don't have much to say,
So, I want you to know it's a little fucked up,
That I'm stuck here waitin', at times debatin',
Tellin' you that I've had it with you and your career,
Me and the rest of the family here singing "Where'd you go?"

I miss you so,
Seems like it's been forever,
That you've been gone.
Where'd you go?
I miss you so,
Seems like it's been forever,
That you've been gone,
Please come back home...

You know the place where you used to live,
Used to BBQ up burgers and ribs,
Used to have a little party every Hallowe'en with candy by the pile,
But now, you only stop by every once in a while,
Shit, I find myself just fillin' my time,
Anything to keep the thought of you from my mind,
I'm doin' fine, I plan to keep it that way,
You can call me if you find you have somethin' to say,
And I'll tell you, I want you to know it's a little fucked up,
That I'm stuck here waitin', at times debatin',
Tellin' you that I've had it with you and your career,
Me and the rest of the family here singing "Where'd you go?"

I miss you so,
Seems like it's been forever,
That you've been gone.
Where'd you go?
I miss you so,
Seems like it's been forever,
That you've been gone,
Please come back home...

I want you to know it's a little fucked up,
That I'm stuck here waitin', no longer debatin',
Tired of sittin' and hatin' and makin' these excuses,
For while you're not around, and feeling so useless,
It seems one thing has been true all along,
You don't really know what you got 'til it's gone,
I guess I've had it with you and your career,
When you come back I won't be here and you'll can sing it...

Where'd you go?
I miss you so,
Seems like it's been forever,
That you've been gone.
Where'd you go?
I miss you so,
Seems like it's been forever,
That you've been gone,
Please come back home...
Please come back home...

P.S.

2006-05-21T19:41:26Z

I checked my email and stuff today, but I have yet to check my MySpace account. I'll do that later. Wow, I'm lazy. :)

belovedmania @ 2006-05-21T14:29:00

2006-05-21T19:30:25Z

I feel like vomit.
I think I'm just going to lay in bed and call someone back...yay for long distance phone calls!!

I'll do a real update soon when I actually feel like using the internet. :-P

belovedmania @ 2006-05-12T19:50:00

2006-05-13T00:52:25Z

Since I cannot afford to buy my ma a Mother's Day gift, she suggested that I make her dinner or something. I think I have the perfect dessert...I just need to figure out the rest. :)

If I don't get a job soon...my PO is not going to be happy. And trust me, I feel yucky being unemployed. :(

And he said to me, "My love for you is unconditional."

2006-05-05T21:33:27Z

I talked to my father last night and he is EXACTLY like me!! Yeah, so much that it is actually quite eerie. I'm supposed to visit him this summer...perhaps around his 42nd birthday on July 24th. =) I'd love to visit before then, but we'll see. There are so many great things I want to say about him, too. Call me if you're interested in hearing about my daaaaaaaddy. It feels so amazing to say, "I have a dad! I have another grandpa, too!" They're both amazing people and it's a concept that just blows my mind. That's all I've been able to talk about as of late. I told my father about how a certain guy used to call me up at 3 am while we were dating, just to tell me he was gonna slit his throat...or call me a cunt (yeah, Chris...your favorite word!) And my dad says, "I think maybe he was the cunt. Can't Understand Normal Thinking." How cool is that? =)

My stomach is doing flips right now, so I think I ought to lay down with my crazy poopy puppy on the couch. I have much more to say, but that'll be done later. Nap time for me right now, then I need to fill out the applications I picked up at Mayfair yesterday. Ta ta everybody!!

P.S. I love you, Miss Amanda Sue.

belovedmania @ 2006-05-02T17:23:00

2006-05-02T22:30:26Z

Life's pretty chill right now and things are totally looking up. i missed out on the volunteer thing again today, but i have a huge packet somewhere with a lonnnnnnnng list of volunteer opportunities. I need to switch my major, get another job, and focus on school first before I take up any extracurricular things. :) I have faith in myself, though. I've had a lot of positive and negative things occur within the last week, but the positives definitely outweighed the negatives. Take for instance....figuring out where my dad is and talking to my other grandfather for the first time in my life. I think that could pretty much outweigh any negative thing thrown at me. I haven't called my dad yet, but I think I'll do that tonight after I take a nice relaxing shower with some new yummy smelling stuff from Bath & Body Works...I'll come out of the shower smelling like white chocolate. :-P

I miss my Amanda Sue horribly.

I received a visitation form from Jim yesterday. I filled it out asap and dropped it off at the post office before the last pick-up (5:15 pm.) I also got a letter from Richard today which was pretty awesome. :) I sent a few pictures of myself to my grandfather yesterday, so he should get them by the end of the week. My biological mom (Chris) found some more pictures from back in the day when she was dating my biological father, so I'm looking forward to seeing those soon! Sooo many things to look forward to. I have AODA tomorrow morning...I know it sounds corny, but I look forward to AODA because I like most of the people there. I'm thinking about going to NA tonight, too. It's been a while since I've been to an NA meeting....I think that's just because I prefer a smaller/more intimate setting like my AODA group. Most NA groups tend to be too large and inconsistent...you almost never see the same people twice. Most/almost all of them are significantly older than I am, which I like anyway...I'm weird like that. I don't care for many people in my little age bracket. ;) I think it's shower time...and the dog is being too quiet...that can only mean trouble...